Change of Life
by babyphd
Summary: Abbey experiences a drastic change in her life.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Abbey, you have to tell Jed what's going on. He's your husband and he has a right to know there might be something wrong."

"But Millie, he's just been so worried over some type of crisis with Turkey. He's gone half the night in the Situation Room and I just don't want to bother him."

"Abbey, it could be nothing. We both know that. But he has a right to know that you're not well."

The two women were sitting in the sunroom off the main hall of the Residence, each holding a glass of wine and their feet propped up on the coffee table. Millie had been trying to persuade Abbey to discuss her health with Jed, but Abbey was stubbornly refusing to even consider it.

"Maybe after I see the doctor on Friday. Jed leaves Friday morning for a weekend trip to Florida and that will give me time to get my act together with facts. If I don't have the facts, all he will do is jump to the most serious illness known to man. So just let me get the facts and then I'll let him know."

"You promise?"

"Yes, I promise. I just don't think it's serious enough to worry him about it unnecessarily."

"Abbey, you mean well, but you're playing with fire. Jed will not like it when he finds out something has been wrong for the last few weeks and you've been withholding it from him."

"Well, I am doing it for him. He'll understand."

"Abbey, I don't think so. I've been around you a few times when he has found out something you kept from him. Even if it for his own good, he won't take it that way. He'll get very angry with you. Does he suspect something is wrong?"

"No. I've been very careful to act normal around him. Except for being tired, I've been successful in acting like everything is fine."

"Abbey, you and Jed are joined at the deepest level. I have never met two people who are so emotionally tied to each other. You read each other's minds, finish each other sentences. I can't believe he doesn't suspect something."

"Well, he doesn't. If he did, he would have talked to me."

Millie sighed. "You know more than you're letting on, don't you? You're a physician for God's sake. He needs to know what you suspect. Don't keep it from him."

"Millie, I'm not going to worry him unnecessarily. He is President of the United States and he's got more important things to worry about than some minor problem I might have."

Millie shook her head again. "Is there anything I can say to persuade you otherwise?"

"No. My mind is made up. I'll tell Jed after I see the doctor. And not a moment before."

"You're stubborn, you know that?"

"This time it's for his own good. He'll understand."

"I hope so. I only hope so."

Millie just shook her head. Abbey could be a jackass herself at times.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Jed's POV:

Something's wrong with Abbey. I just know it. She has been so distant these last few weeks. When I ask her what's wrong, she just says 'nothing'. Well, I read her like a book and something's not right.

This is not my Abbey.

When we cuddle at night and hold each other, I feel her tense and then finally relax when the kissing doesn't lead to anything. I've tried to initiate sex for the last couple of weeks, but all she says is that she's tired or she has a headache. She usually is eager for sex, but not lately. It's almost like she's pleased that I've gotten called out of bed at all hours for the past few nights. When I come back to bed, I know she's awake. She thinks I think she's asleep, but I know better.

This is not my Abbey.

She's getting circles under her eyes and doesn't seem to have much of an appetite. At the last state dinner, she begged off right after dinner and one dance. I let her go because I know something is wrong. I make excuses for her and no one dares question me otherwise. But then she denies that anything is wrong.

This is not my Abbey.

It must be pretty obvious that something is wrong when Zoey shows up in my office wondering what is wrong with her mother. I have no answers for her. Her mother won't talk to anybody about whatever it is that is troubling her. Not even me.

This is not my Abbey.

She is usually quite a feisty woman, but in the last few weeks she barely disagrees with anyone. Even with me, she just smiles and says 'That's fine' to everything. That is not my Abbey. My Abbey would stand up and yell until I finally give in. That's our usual pattern.

This is not my Abbey.

Something's wrong.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Abbey, come with me to Florida. You don't have any plans for the weekend and this will be chance for us to be together. I know work has kept me from you these past few weeks, and this will be a great chance to make up for that."

Jed was trying to persuade Abbey to come with him on the spur of the moment. It was early Friday morning, just minutes before he was scheduled to depart.

"It'll be great."

"No thanks. You'll be giving two speeches and attending three fundraisers. I don't think you'll have that much time for me. I'm going to stay here with the peace and quiet. It's time I just sat back and relaxed. You go on. I'll be fine. Besides, if I get lonely, then all I have to do is pick up the phone, right? That's one perk that comes with this office. You can't run away and hide, now can you?"

Abbey hoped he wouldn't see through her lies.

She walked over to him, put her arms around him, and gathered him in for a hug. "But I will miss you." Her lips found his and they joined for just a brief instant.

"Mr. President, you need to leave." Damn Charlie.

"Okay. I'll be right there. Abbey, you're looking tired. Please get some rest while I'm gone. I'll be home Sunday night." They kissed one more time. "Gotta go, hon. Love you."

"Love you too."

Jed turned and left.

He knew something was wrong. He made up his mind to force her Sunday night to tell him what it was.

But Sunday night would be too late.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Sitting in the gynecologist's office after her exam, Abbey listened as her doctor explained her options.

During Abbey's last year on staff at Mass General, Dr. Kim Cox had been one of her favorite surgical residents. She had looked Kim up when they had moved to Washington in 1999 and had been seeing her on a yearly basis. Dr. Cox wanted to do a diagnostic D&C to find out why Abbey had been experiencing heavy bleeding for the past couple of weeks. An ultrasound had been inconclusive so a more invasive procedure was the best means of coming to a confirmed diagnosis.

"I can do it on Tuesday. Will you be available then?"

"I don't want to wait that long. Jed will be back Sunday night. If I have this surgery, I want it before he gets home. Can you schedule it sooner?"

"Abbey, it's not a matter of 'if' you have the surgery. It's 'when'."

Down deep, Abbey knew she really didn't have a choice. She had to know what was wrong. "I know. Can you possibly schedule it for tomorrow? I know this is short notice, but I really want to know what's wrong before Jed comes back. I think he knows something is not right with me so the sooner I know what's going on, I can prepare myself with the facts. I know surgery is not usually done on the weekend, but can you do this as a favor to me?"

"Abbey, I'm not trying to be a marriage counselor, but don't you think the President will want to be here with you? You two appear to have a solid marriage, and I know I would want my husband with me when I'm undergoing anesthesia. It would bring me great comfort. Why don't you want him to be there?"

"Kim, he's been so stressed out recently. There have been so many issues for him to deal with that I won't add anything else. Besides, this is such a routine procedure that I'll be fine by the time he gets back Sunday night, and I'll have the facts to discuss any problems with him. That is, if there are any problems."

"I disagree with you, but it is your relationship." Kim sighed. It was obvious that Abbey was not going to tell her husband about her problems. "Okay. Let me call and see if I can get an OR for tomorrow."

By the time Abbey left, her surgery had been scheduled for seven am. Even though she would be driven back to the White House afterwards, Abbey agreed with Kim to have a friend come with her.

She also knew that she had to let Ron know what was going on. But she was going to insist that Jed not be told. She knew Ron would agree to it. Personal issues were not the responsibility of the Secret Service.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Early the next morning, Abbey was in pre-op, waiting for her surgery to begin.

"How are you feeling, Abbey?" Millie stood over the stretcher, still upset over Abbey's insistence not to call Jed. But arguing with a brick wall was not going to change things so she had agreed to come and support her best friend.

A quiet giggle was her response. Millie knew right away how Abbey was feeling.

"Abbey, how are you feeling?" Millie repeated the question, knowing that the pre-op drugs were already taking effect.

"Good. Calm. High." She knew she was in good hands. She trusted Kim with her life.

Kim and Millie had to stifle a laugh. It was quite obvious that the pre-op medicines were working very well for the First Lady.

"Well, good. The little cocktail has done its job. Are you ready?"

Abbey looked up at the two women and just grinned. "Yep."

"See you when you wake up, Abbey." Millie smiled and squeezed her hand. "I'll be right by your side. And I'll be in the OR with you, thanks to Dr. Cox. Behave yourself."

"Yep." That silly grin again.

"Let's go. You're very ready."

With that, Abbey was taken to the OR. A female agent dressed in scrubs would be with her at all times.

She was helped onto the surgical table and wired with the normal monitors. A blood pressure cuff was wrapped around one arm and a warm blanket placed on her upper body.

Dr. Carter, the anesthesiologist, leaned over and asked her if she was ready. As Abbey nodded yes, he placed the mask over her face and told her to breathe deeply. She followed the directions without fear. She knew she would wake up in a couple of hours and have some answers. He injected various medicines into her IV and Abbey quickly lost consciousness. She was intubated and placed on the ventilator.

Only then did Dr. Cox prepare her patient for the procedure.

The procedure went routinely for the first few minutes. Dr. Cox had almost completed the procedure when a stream of blood poured from her patient.

This was an unexpected and dangerous complication, and Millie instantly knew this was far from the expected outcome of this routine procedure.

Everything Dr. Cox tried to stop the bleeding was unsuccessful.

"Pressure's dropping! Increase her fluids!"

The team scrambled to respond to the crisis.

The monitor showed a rapid heartbeat as her body tried to compensate for the continuing massive loss of fluid. As Abbey's pressure continued to drop, Dr. Carter started calling for stat units of blood.

It was quickly becoming a life-threatening issue for the First Lady.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

After unsuccessfully attempting to stop the hemorrhaging, Kim made an immediate decision, the only one she could make given the circumstances. "Prepare for an immediate hysterectomy!"

Millie's heart sank. This routine procedure was now life changing, in ways that no one could have foreseen. But from what she was witnessing, that was the only way to save the Abbey's life. And a decision that Millie completely supported.

The surgical techs quickly changed instrument sets while new drapes were placed on the surgical field. These people trained for these emergencies all the time and knew their responsibilities.

Everyone knew their jobs and cared about every patient they were responsible for. But this patient was different. She was the First Lady of the United States and each person in there felt like they were a personal friend of hers. That made them that much more anxious to stop what was happening.

Millie looked at the monitors and saw only bad news.

Abbey's heart rate was still rapid, a sign that the body was having a hard time compensating for the decreased blood volume. Blood was being hand-squeezed into her by one of the nurses. She was losing blood faster than it was being replaced. A second IV had been quickly inserted into Abbey's other arm and fluid pumped in as quickly as it could safely be replaced.

Dr. Cox's partner quickly came to the OR to assist. Both doctors worked feverishly to make the required incisions and remove the source of the bleeding. They both knew that time was of the essence.

After thirty minutes, the surgeons were finished and the bleeding had been stopped.

Kim and her partner sighed with relief as they closed the final incision.

"How's her blood pressure?"

"Coming back up," Dr. Carter replied. "Kim, you know how close we came to losing her, don't you?"

"Yes. I'm well aware of it." And so was everybody in the room.

"How blood did she lose?"

"Almost 2 liters."

Abbey had lost more than enough to send her into Hypovolemic shock. She was in very critical condition, and would be for some time to come.

Millie was also aware of how close they had come to losing her best friend. And she dreaded the next action she knew she had to do.

Jed had to be called.

And this time Jed would be told everything. Millie shuddered, thinking about his reaction.

There would be hell to pay.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"Mr. President, its Mr. McGarry. He say's it s urgent." Charlie handed him the phone.

Jed had finished his first speech of the day and was in the limousine headed toward another fundraiser.

"Yeah, Leo? Is Turkey acting up again?"

"No, sir."

There was a brief pause. But Jed had heard Leo's tone. He instantly knew something was not right.

"What is it, Leo?"

"It's Abbey, sir."

"Abbey? What's wrong?"

"Sir, I'm about to tell you something and don't shoot the messenger, okay?"

"Hell, Leo. Just tell me. What's wrong with Abbey?"

"She's in critical condition at GW. Millie just called me."

"Was she in an accident? What happened?" Jed's heart rate increased along with his confusion.

"No, sir. She had surgery this morning and has had some major complications."

"Surgery? What kind? I don't understand Leo. She would have told me if she was going to have surgery. I would have been with her."

"Millie said for you to call her and she would explain. But she also said that you need to get back to Washington right away. Jed," Leo paused, trying to frame his next sentence. Finally, he continued. "Millie said that Abbey could die."

"I'm on my way." Jed hung up the phone and glanced up to see Ron nod toward him. He felt the limousine change directions. Ron must have told his agents just as Leo was calling him.

He looked out the window. He knew that nobody could see inside and looking out the window provided him with some privacy.

'Surgery?' He was confused. He knew that Abbey hadn't been feeling well lately, but surgery? Without telling him?

He would call Millie from the plane and get the explanation.

His primary goal was to get back to Washington and get to Abbey's side.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"Ron, did you know about this?"

"About what, sir?"

"Ron, you know exactly what I'm talking about."

"Yes, sir. I did know. I had to make arrangements for Mrs. Bartlet's security at the hospital."

"Well, why the HELL didn't you tell me? I am her husband, in case you didn't know that."

Ron knew that Jed's yelling was not directed at him, but was coming from the worry about his wife. He paused, trying to answer the President without fanning his anger. "Sir, Mrs. Bartlet asked me not to tell you. She said that the surgery was minor and you didn't need to know."

Jed sat back against the seat cushion. "She asked you not to tell me?" He was hurt that Abbey had not trusted him with this information.

"Yes, sir."

Jed paused, knowing that in reality Ron was not responsible for him not having the information. He knew from firsthand experience that Abbey could be very persuasive when she wanted to be.

"Okay, Ron. Abbey manipulated you. What has happened is between my wife and me. Sorry about the yelling."

"Yes, sir."

Jed watched as the motorcade made its way to the airport.

"Can't you drive faster, Ron?"

"No, sir. We are already running with lights and sirens. We'll get you to the plane as soon as possible."

Abbey could die. That thought was unthinkable. It was unbelievable. But that's what Leo had said.

'What had gone wrong?' Jed couldn't believe that Abbey would have any surgery without him knowing about it. It just didn't make any sense.

Finally the motorcade pulled up to Air Force One on the tarmac. Jed leaped out of the limousine without waiting for the agents to open the door. Hair and jacket flying, he took the stairs two at a time and hurried into the Presidential office.

Picking up the phone, he asked to be connected to Dr. Griffith at GW. Waiting to be connected, he rubbed his hand through his hair. A nervous habit when he was stressed. And this certainly was a time of stress.

He finally had Millie on the phone.

"Hello Mr. President."

"What the hell is going on? I got a call from Leo about Abbey. He said something about her having surgery and possibly dying."

Softly, Millie responded. "It's true Jed"

Right away, Jed knew this was serious. Millie was responding as a life long friend, not as the Surgeon General of the United States.

"Millie, what's going on? Abbey never told me she was having surgery today. She's not been feeling well lately but never mentioned this possibility."

"Yes, Jed. I tried to get her to tell you about her problems many times over the past two weeks but she kept saying you had more serious things on your mind and she didn't want to bother you with her problems. At least not until she knew more about what was going on."

"That's not an answer. First, how is she right now?"

"She lost a great deal of blood and is in ICU, unconscious and on the ventilator." Millie was trying not to tell the President everything until he could get back to Washington.

Jed fought back the tears. "You have to tell me what kind of surgery she had. What kind of problem?"

"It was female surgery."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"It means she has been having a lot of bleeding lately and she decided to undergo this procedure, which normally is routine, to get more information. In normal circumstances, she would have been in and out in a matter of hours and by the time you got home on Sunday, she would have more information to tell you what was going on. But it wasn't routine."

"Millie, you have to tell me what happened." Jed was exasperated about Millie's evasive answers.

There was a brief silence on the other end.

"Jed, I have to go. The doctor wants to talk with me. Just get here as soon as you can. Abbey needs you. She needs you real bad."

The silence on the other end told Jed Millie had hung up. Placing the phone back in the cradle, he allowed tears to fall from his eyes. "I'm coming, Abbey. I'm on my way. Just hang on."

Hope was all he had. He prayed the plane would fly faster than it had ever flown. With God's help, maybe he would make it in time.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Two long hours later, the Presidential motorcade pulled up to the side Emergency Room entrance in an attempt to shield the President from the massive press presence already gathered in front of GW.

It hadn't taken long for the press to find out why he had abruptly canceled his trip and headed back to Washington. His staff hadn't found out about the reason for the abrupt change in plans and the emergency departure from Florida until they were already in the air. Everybody's belongings were left behind in their hotel rooms. The Service would make sure all the bags would make it safely back to Washington and returned to their rightful owners.

The press bus had changed directions with the rest of the motorcade. The press had pressured CJ to know why the sudden change in plans, but she was in the dark as well until after they had boarded the plane coming home. However, once the reason was known, no complaints were heard from the press. CJ had to give thanks for that small blessing.

Ignoring the gathered press, the President quickly entered the door to greet Millie, who was standing by the door.

"Millie, why didn't Abbey want to me know about this?"

"Jed, you know she's a stubborn woman. No matter what I said to her, she refused to tell you before it was over. This should have been routine but it wasn't."

"Damn straight, it wasn't. Next time, don't follow her directions. Tell me anything I need to know. Will you promise me that?"

Millie shook her head. "I can't Jed. She told me in confidence. I can't break that confidence."

Jed knew Millie was right. It wasn't hers or Ron's responsibility to inform him on what Abbey was doing. It was Abbey's job to do that. But right now he had a higher priority.

"How is she now?" He looked as anxious as he felt.

"No change. Her blood pressure has stabilized, but she's still not breathing on her own. And now the doctors are worried about something called DIC."

"What the hell is DIC?"

"It's called disseminated vascular coagulation. Basically, Abbey's blood tries so hard to clot after something like the hemorrhage she had in the OR that it over compensates. Instead of too much clotting, there's not enough clotting and she can bleed to death quite rapidly."

Jed stopped walking and turned to Millie. "Oh my God! Is there any treatment? Can anything be done to prevent it from occurring?"

"No, sir. The doctors have given her some medication to help her blood clot, but it will take a while to work. So if DIC occurs, all we can do is replace the volume and hope for the best."

Jed leaned against the wall for a minute. He had hoped the danger was over.

Straightening, he pulled back his shoulders and started walking again. "Okay, let's go. I need to see my wife."

"Yes, sir."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Jed entered the ICU to see a person unrecognizable as his wife.

Pale skin against the white sheets told him that all was not well.

As he touched her arm for the first time, his hand recoiled at the coolness of her skin. She was breathing by mechanical means and every orifice looked like it had a wire or tube coming from it. A bag of blood hung from IV hooks over the bed, along with two bags of fluid. IV and cardiac monitors beeped, giving him the only hope that she would live.

He sat down by her bedside and the only words he knew came to his lips. "I love you, Abbey." Tears tried to form in his eyes, but he forced them back down.

He sat there for the next few hours, never moving from her side and always praying for her recovery.

The staff came and did their checks, but there was no change.

Jed only sat there and stared at Abbey, wondering why she had not called him.

Surgery of any kind was serious and he still had no clue why she didn't call him.

When he talked to Millie on the plane, all she said that Abbey had not wanted to worry him.

Hell, she was his wife and he her husband. Spouses worried about each other and were there for each other. That was just the way things were supposed to be.

The girls arrived from Manchester later that night. All of them had been together for Doug's birthday and had to wait to come until arrangements could be made. When Jed had talked to them on the plane back from Florida, they had become very upset. Zoey especially had realized that something was wrong with her mother and she had expressed her feelings to her sisters. But they had no clue about her plans either.

In the middle of the night, Liz came to her father and tried to persuade him to leave Abbey's side. "Dad, you need to rest. There's nothing that you can do for Mom right now."

"Yes, there is. I can stay here and pray for her recovery. I'm not leaving her until she wakes up."

"You're stubborn, did you know that?"

Jed smiled. He knew that the girls were only thinking of his wellbeing but he was not going to leave Abbey until she woke up. "Liz, I'm fine. Your mother needs me right now."

Sighing, Liz paused while she thought of a new argument. "What if Aunt Millie stayed with Mom? Would that satisfy you enough? The last we need is for you to get sick as well. You know Mom would be really mad if she knew you were pushing yourself so hard."

Jed knew Liz was right. Abbey would really be pissed if he ruined his health in his worry over her. "Okay. You go get Millie and I'll leave for a few hours."

"Great! She's right outside."

"Hey! You tricked me."

Liz smiled. "I learned it from the master. Now come on."

Reluctantly, Jed stood, kissed Abbey's forehead. "I love you Abbey. Please get better." He then turned and walked out of ICU with Liz. "I love you too, Liz, in spite of your little tricks."

Liz only smiled. Like she told her father, she had learned from the master.

Jed spent the rest of the night in the Presidential Suite, catnapping, worrying. He got up almost every two hours to check on Abbey, but still no progress.

The ventilator was removed in the early morning. At least some progress was being made. But due to her extreme blood loss, she remained unconscious.

All of them were waiting on one person.

Abbey.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"Mr. President? Mr. President?" A strange voice cut through his sleep.

He jerked awake to find a strange woman bending over him.

"Yes? Is it about Abbey?"

"Yes, sir. I'm Dr. Cox, your wife's doctor. I'm sorry I haven't had anytime to talk with you before now. I've had several emergencies to take care of."

"Just tell me how my wife is. I haven't had any news since I left ICU."

"Abbey, I mean Mrs. Bartlet, is awake. She's been conscious for the last half hour and we're going to move her up here. But I want to talk with you a minute before that happens."

Jed stood up, his face visibly less stressed than just a few minutes before.

"Yes. I want to hear all about this problem. I knew nothing about it until I received a phone call yesterday. Abbey's friend, Dr. Griffith, only told me that my wife had been seeing you for a female problem and that the surgery should have been routine, but of course, wasn't. Please tell me some more details."

"Yes, sir. Please sit down and let me explain. First, Mrs. Bartlet doesn't know I'm talking with you. I have a high level of respect for your wife. She was my best attending of all of my surgical rotations during my residency and I have admired her all these years. Your wife has been seeing me on a yearly basis for the past five years, while you have lived here in Washington. Routine stuff. Pap smears. Mammograms. That sort of thing. But a few days ago she called and said that she had been having some abnormal and heavy vaginal bleeding for the past couple of weeks. I made arrangements to see her Friday, examined her, and did a couple of non-invasive tests, which were inconclusive. That's why I wanted to do a D&C."

Jed held up his hand. "Wait. Tell me what a D&C is. That's way out of my league."

"A D&C is a dilatation and curettage. Basically, the patient is under anesthesia while I dilate the cervical opening and scrape any contents of the uterine cavity out. In many cases, the bleeding will stop just by doing the procedure itself. I hoped it would give me additional information on the cause of her bleeding. It would also allow me to take a biopsy of uterine tissue to check for cancer. And, Mr. President, before you start to worry, there was no evidence I could visibly see that would lead me anywhere near that diagnosis. The sample is in the lab now and I'll have the report probably by tomorrow. Anyway, she started to have uncontrolled bleeding and her life was in danger. I did the only thing I could do. I did an emergency hysterectomy. That means…"

Jed knew exactly what that meant. "Yes, I know what that means. It means she is unable to have any more children."

"Well, yes sir. It would mean that if your wife was of childbearing age. But she's not. Mrs. Bartlet had already had signs of menopause and this will initiate what is called surgical menopause. I took her ovaries as well so she will be experiencing all the signs of menopause for the next few months while her body adjusts to having no estrogen. I can prescribe her hormones, but that will be her choice. I just wanted you to know all of this because I have yet to tell her. Since she has just now awakened for the first time since surgery, she has not been told what I had to do in the OR. Women accept it in different ways. I don't have a clue how Mrs. Bartlet will deal with it, but I wanted you prepared in any case."

"If she asks, should I tell her?"

"Yes, sir. If she asks you, be very direct with her. Answer all of her questions. Being a physician I doubt if she will have any medical questions but psychologically, she might have some trouble with the more intimate side of your relationship. I just…"

Dr. Cox's speech was interrupted by a team pushing the First Lady's bed into the suite.

Jed smiled at the sight of his wife finally being awake and nearby.

But the easy part had past. The hard part was just beginning.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

After the staff got her settled in her new space, Abbey looked over and saw Jed. 'What is he doing here? It's still Saturday. And why do I have all this equipment attached to me? This is not normal for such routine surgery. What has happened?" Abbey's thoughts swirled through her brain.

Smiling, Jed walked over to her bed, unsure as to what he should say next.

"What are you doing here? You're supposed to be in Florida."

"Well, I came back early."

"Why?"

"You."

"Me?"

"Yes, you."

"Jed, quit answering me with one word. Why are you here? You weren't supposed to come back until Sunday…Wait, what day is today?"

"Sunday."

"But I had the surgery on Saturday." There was a pause while her tired brain put two and two together. "Jed, what's going on?"

"You had some complications from the surgery, Abbey. Millie called me yesterday and asked me to come back because you were sick. Very sick. You almost died."

"You know about the surgery?"

"Yeah. Dr. Cox explained everything to me. Why didn't you tell me, Abbey? Why didn't you tell me you were sick? I knew you weren't feeling good these past few weeks. Why didn't you talk with me?"

Abbey broke eye contact with him. "I didn't want you to worry about me until I knew what was wrong."

Jed grabbed her hand. "Abbey, that's what I'm for. To worry about you. To care about you. To wonder what you're doing at every minute of every day."

"I know, Jed. I'm sorry."

Jed leaned in to kiss Abbey and she let him do it willingly.

"Now, did Kim say what she found?"

"Yes." Now it was Jed's turn to move his eyes away from Abbey's.

"Jed, what's wrong?"

Jed gathered up all his strength and looked directly at his wife. "There were some complications in the OR. When she did the D&C, you began to hemorrhage heavily. They were unable to stem the bleeding. Kim had to do an emergency hysterectomy to stop the bleeding. You almost died, Abbey. She had no choice."

"A hysterectomy?" Her voice cracked with the words.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Abbey repeated what she thought Jed had just told her. "A hysterectomy?"

"Yes." Jed tried to be strong for his wife.

"Why?"

"You were bleeding to death Abbey. You lost almost half of your blood before they could stop it. It was the only way."

Abbey just stared at Jed, in shock at the outcome of what should have been such a routine surgery. 'What defines me as a woman has been taken away from me without my knowledge or consent. What will happen to our relationship now? I have always been a complete woman for him. It might sound old-fashioned, but giving him children and giving him satisfaction as a man has been my life. My children and career are important, but man staring at me right now is the most important part of my life. I have spent almost four decades satisfying him and he satisfying me. But how…..how can I do the same things, give him the same level of satisfaction that he has been used to?'

Tears started to slide down the side of her face.

Jed reached for her hand, trying to express his feelings of love toward her.

"Shh, Abbey, its okay. I still love you as before. Nothing has changed."

But it had. And she knew it.

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Abbey woke from a short nap. She smiled as she realized Jed was sitting next to the bed, staring at her. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi, yourself. How do you feel?"

"Strange."

He quickly got up from his chair and walked over to her. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know. I feel lightheaded. Maybe you should get somebody. I just feel really…." Abbey's eyes suddenly rolled to the back of her head as she lost consciousness.

"Abbey! Abbey!"

Unable to wake her, Jed ran to the door. "Help! Something's wrong with my wife!"

The nurse at the desk looked up to see a very frightened husband screaming for help. He wasn't the President then. He was terrified. Running into the room, she checked Abbey's pulse, and then quickly threw back the sheet to see blood everywhere.

The nurse picked up the phone and paged Dr. Cox stat.

Jed saw the blood all over Abbey and the bed. "Oh my God! What's going on?"

The nurse had a higher priority than to answer him. She quickly took Abbey's blood pressure and kept checking her pulse. She increased the flow of Abbey's IV.

Dr. Cox ran into the room and did her own checks. "Notify ICU we're coming. I need for you to call my partner stat and get him over here." The nurse nodded and went to carry out the instructions.

Kim saw how frightened the President was. The news she had for him was not going to put him at ease.

"Mr. President, I think your wife is having an episode of DIC. That is …"

"I know already. Dr. Griffith explained it me yesterday. Is she going to live?"

"I don't know, sir. I will do everything I can to save her."

As she was finishing her quick statement, two orderlies ran into the room and raced Abbey's bed out of the room.

No chance to say goodbye.

Jed could only hope he would see her again.

Alive.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Three long hours later, an exhausted Dr. Cox came to report on Abbey's status.

The girls had been consoling Jed, who just knew Abbey had died and nobody would tell him.

He had made quite a scene with the nurse demanding to know something, anything from ICU. The nurse had called and each time was the same answer—nothing to report. But that did nothing to ease his mind.

Finally, Liz and Ellie had each grabbed a shoulder and forced him back into the suite and pushed him into a chair. He had been ordered to stay there until they said get up. He followed their directions. Somebody else was in charge this time.

"Mr. President, your wife is alive. She lost a great deal of blood until we could reverse the condition, but now I think we've passed a critical stage. I've had two hematology experts working with me and we are confident that she'll be fine. But I still want her in ICU at least through tomorrow just to be on the safe side."

"Is she awake?"

"No, sir. She's so weak that sleep is the best thing for her right now. But she continues to breathe on her own and does respond to stimuli. Those are the good signs."

"Can we see her?"

"Give me another hour or so and I'll call. I just want to make sure she's stable."

Sitting by her bed in ICU Jed's thoughts were racing.

She might live. She might not. Quit that thinking. Of course she's going to live. And I love her very much.

She's been through so much without me. She didn't want to bother me with her problems. Hell, that's what people who love each other do. They share their problems. They share their victories and share their defeats. God knows how much I've burdened her with all this MS crap.

She's been there for me always. And she'll be there for me and the children forever more. Got to have faith. She'll be by my side forever. That has been known as long as we have been together. God sent me a special woman. She had to be special to Him because I decided not to serve Him after I met Abigail.

But now I have to support her. Now I have to love her with all my heart. That won't be hard. I couldn't love her any more than I do right now. The next few months are going to be rough for her. But I'll be there. I'll be by her side forever. That's the only thing I will accept.

He leaned forward and gently kissed her hand. She was going to be fine. He wouldn't accept anything less.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

"How are you feeling?"

"You just asked me that an hour ago."

"Well, I'm concerned. You've been through a lot."

It had been a relatively quiet week. Abbey had recovered from her surgery and the complications, and had been discharged from the hospital earlier that day. She was resting comfortably on the their bed in the Residence. And Jed was hovering over her, like she was a fragile china doll.

"Jed, we need to come to an understanding. I'm fine. I'm an adult and I will tell you when I need something."

"I know you're an adult, Abbey. I just worry about you."

"That's sweet. But I'm really fine. Now come to bed. It's late."

This was the first night in over a week that they had slept with each other. After what had happened in the last week, they both needed to feel each other's arms around them. Abbey rested her head on Jed's chest and looked into his eyes.

"Do you know how much I love you?"

Jed smiled. "I think I do." He leaned down and planted a gentle kiss on his wife's lips. She kissed him back.

"Now, Jed, you know we can't start anything."

"That's okay. I love you Abbey, and I will wait as long as I need to."

Tears pooled in her eyes and spilled over, streaking down her face.

"Abbey, what's wrong? Are you in pain?"

"No, Jed. It's nothing."

"Abbey, let's don't start that again. Tell me what wrong."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Abbey sat up and pushed back against the headboard, grimacing with a twinge of pain.

She wanted to look at Jed, but couldn't.

"I'm scared, Jed. I'm only half a woman. This surgery took away half of me. It took it without warning. Without any chance to come to terms with such a drastic change."

"Scared about what, Abbey? Please baby. Please tell me what's bothering you."

"I'm scared about the future."

"Abbey, that's crazy."

"No. it's not. You don't understand. My uterus was part of me, an essential part of me. I can't have any more children. No more monthly periods where I know I'm functioning as a woman."

"Abbey, look at me." Jed had moved to sit in front of her. Only when Abbey's eyes met his, did he continue.

"Abbey, you're a doctor. You know that you're more than what was taken. You're so much more. This will not affect how much I love you. Kim said you were starting menopause already so your periods were going to end. And we are certainly too old to even consider having another child. You have two grandchildren you can love as well as any children that Ellie or Zoey might have. So what is the real problem?"

Abbey glanced away from Jed as she couldn't look her husband in the eyes.

"Abbey, look at me. What is the real reason you're upset about this?"

He took his fingers and moved her face so she was forced to look into his eyes. Eyes full of love and understanding.

"I worry about pleasing you. The surgery removed the parts of me that makes me a woman. How can I satisfy you if those parts are gone? They are an integral part of my response to you. We work so hard to satisfy each other."

"You satisfy me no matter what we're doing. In the kitchen, in the barn, watching TV, everywhere. So we won't have sex as often. That's okay. I married you for who you are, not for the sex. I fell in love with you a long time before we had sex. Now, don't get me wrong. The sex has been great. But I would much prefer having you by my side healthy than have great sex and you not healthy. Do you believe me? I love you for you. And I always will."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Abbey, please believe me baby. We have a future together."

Abbey knew that Jed meant every word he said. But what would he do when reality sank in? When he didn't get the same response from her now as he did before?

There was no answer from Abbey, so Jed continued. "If you're worried about this, talk to your doctor. I doubt you're the first woman with these fears."

"I will. I have a check-up in a few weeks. I'll ask."

Abbey wiggled herself back over to Jed. "In the meantime, we need to sleep."

They quickly fell asleep in each other's arms. At least for tonight there was no fear in either's heart.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

The next eight weeks went by uneventfully. Abbey's incision healed and Kim gave permission to resume her normal life. But there had been very little discussion, after that first night at home, of her fear of being less than a total woman to Jed. Her fear of being less of a sexual being than she had been before the surgery.

She had talked with Kim and had also talked with several women Kim had referred her to.

Much to her surprise, the women had said that their sex lives had actually improved since the hysterectomy. They too had thought it was all over after surgery, but in fact, it had only gotten better.

Finally, Abbey decided that it was time to test the waters. She ordered a special surprise dinner to be brought to the bedroom around seven pm. Wine had been chilled, candles lit and flowers placed around the room. She had purchased a little number for tonight from Victoria's Secret. Actually, Millie had purchased the outfit for her because it wasn't a number that she wanted the public to know about.

Abbey was nervous. She didn't know if she could go through with this. But she had to make the effort. She needed facts.

Jed was late, as usual. When he finally entered the bedroom and saw what was waiting for him, he quickly closed the door. He walked over to the table and pulled the wine out of the cooler.

"Looking for a drink?"

Jed's head turned around to see where that voice was coming from.

One look at Abbey and he smiled, "Yeah."

She walked over to him, making sure her movements were being watched. Her red satin sleeping slip, swung lightly with her movements. Jed immediately could tell she had nothing else on.

"Abbey?" He hoped that her actions meant how he was interpreting them. It had been way too long for him. Too long for both of them.

She walked over to him and grabbed his chin. "That's my name." Her tongue split his lips and danced down his throat.

He dropped the wine back into the chiller and grabbed her shoulders. He sensed her nervousness, the slight trembling signifying her hesitancy, her fear.

He looked into her eyes, telegraphing the main question: 'Are you sure?'

With the slightest nod from her head, he knew she knew exactly what she was doing.

He quickly responded to her lips as his hands stroked down between her breasts. He moved his mouth down her neck and felt the tremors in Abbey's body as she responded to his touch. His face moved on to the cavity between her breasts, rubbing his hands over her satin covered nipples.

Pulling his face up, he looked into her eyes. "You don't need this," pulling the straps off her shoulders and sliding the satiny fabric off her body to expose every beautiful area.

"Aren't you overdressed as well?" Abbey was trying to unbutton his shirt.

"Yeah, but I'm busy at the moment," as one hand cupped a breast and another reached below.

"Well, Jed. Play fair. Off with your clothes." As he moved his hands away from her to take off his clothes, an empty feeling flashed through her soul.

But it quickly left when Jed finished his task and pulled her over to the bed. He was ready for her in every way.

As he gently pulled her onto the bed, he asked his question once again, "Are you sure you're ready?"

Abbey nodded her head. "Yes," was all she could say.

With her permission, his mouth attacked her nipples as he felt the tremors continue to go through her body. One hand rubbed her back as the other lightly stroked her thighs. She took him in her hand and rubbed him as he responded to her actions. Her other hand stroked his back, feeling the warmth of their bodies together for the first time in weeks.

He knew she was ready as he raised her legs and his mouth found her opening, wet and hot. Her moans were intense as his tongue found the place it sought.

Abbey had no doubt now about her reactions. The ecstasy of him was enveloping her body and sending waves of pleasure through her soul.

Actions replaced words as he entered her gently, looking at her face to gauge her reaction. She grabbed his hair and forced their lips together. He had to be inside her in more than one way.

It wasn't long before she exploded with release and shortly after, he followed her.

Breathing heavily, they both waited as the intensity of their joining decreased. Shortly, he pulled out and rolled over next to her.

"I love you, Abbey."

Abbey smiled as she replied, "I love you, too."

She then knew that the change in her life would be just fine.

'Everything will be fine', Jed thought. 'I have my Abbey back'.

THE END


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